powerboatr
living well in Texas
no words needed
Joke of the day
- Thread starter 95_stroker
- Start date
02SilverStroke
Full Access Member
That's a good one!!!!!powerboatr said:
W4RLR
High Tech Hillbilly
I like this one:
W4RLR
High Tech Hillbilly
The new supermarket, near our house has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh.
Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.
When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and experience the scent of fresh hay.
When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying.
The veggie department features the sound of a gentle breeze and the smell of fresh buttered corn.
I don't buy toilet paper there any more.
Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.
When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and experience the scent of fresh hay.
When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying.
The veggie department features the sound of a gentle breeze and the smell of fresh buttered corn.
I don't buy toilet paper there any more.
powerboatr
living well in Texas
hmmmm me to 
did you doctor that picture
did you doctor that picture
W4RLR
High Tech Hillbilly
Fly the friendly skies...
Dallas Tower: "Dallas Tower to Saudi Air 911. You are cleared to land on runway 9R."
Saudi Air: "Thank you, Dallas. Acknowledge cleared to land on Infidel's runway 9R. Allah Be Praised!"
Dallas Tower: "Dallas Tower to Iran Air 296. You are cleared to land on runway 27L."
Iran Air: "Thank you, Dallas Tower. Acknowledge cleared to land on Infidel's runway 27L. Allah Is Great!"
Pause: Static ..............
Saudi Air: "DALLAS TOWER! DALLAS TOWER!"
Dallas Tower: "Go ahead, Saudi Air 911."
Saudi Air: "YOU HAVE CLEARED OUR AIRCRAFT AND IRAN AIR FOR THE SAME RUNWAY, GOING IN OPPOSITE DIRECTIONS! WE ARE ON A COLLISION COURSE! INSTRUCTIONS PLEASE!
Dallas Tower: "Well bless your hearts. Y'all be careful now and tell Allah 'hey' for us, ya hear?"
Dallas Tower: "Dallas Tower to Saudi Air 911. You are cleared to land on runway 9R."
Saudi Air: "Thank you, Dallas. Acknowledge cleared to land on Infidel's runway 9R. Allah Be Praised!"
Dallas Tower: "Dallas Tower to Iran Air 296. You are cleared to land on runway 27L."
Iran Air: "Thank you, Dallas Tower. Acknowledge cleared to land on Infidel's runway 27L. Allah Is Great!"
Pause: Static ..............
Saudi Air: "DALLAS TOWER! DALLAS TOWER!"
Dallas Tower: "Go ahead, Saudi Air 911."
Saudi Air: "YOU HAVE CLEARED OUR AIRCRAFT AND IRAN AIR FOR THE SAME RUNWAY, GOING IN OPPOSITE DIRECTIONS! WE ARE ON A COLLISION COURSE! INSTRUCTIONS PLEASE!
Dallas Tower: "Well bless your hearts. Y'all be careful now and tell Allah 'hey' for us, ya hear?"
W4RLR
High Tech Hillbilly
powerboatr said:hmmmm me to
did you doctor that picture
acjjkamp
Blitz and Harley
nice pic rray (both) would love to see that for real
acjjkamp
Blitz and Harley
stutter
A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. "Human beings are the only animals that stutter", she says.
A little girl raises her hand. "I had a kitty-cat who stuttered", she volunteered.
The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.
"Well", she began, "I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler who lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!
"That must've been scary", said the teacher.
"It sure was", said the little girl. "My kitty went 'Fffff, Fffff, Fffff'... and before she could say "F**k," the Rottweiler ate her!"
A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. "Human beings are the only animals that stutter", she says.
A little girl raises her hand. "I had a kitty-cat who stuttered", she volunteered.
The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.
"Well", she began, "I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler who lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!
"That must've been scary", said the teacher.
"It sure was", said the little girl. "My kitty went 'Fffff, Fffff, Fffff'... and before she could say "F**k," the Rottweiler ate her!"
