hheynow
Señor Aceite de Soja
I'm speechless!
Gotta love Texas
- Thread starter hheynow
- Start date
I'm speechless!
hheynow
Señor Aceite de Soja
RenoF250
DungBeetle
What about Porn?? Arizona has stores with Liquor, guns, and porn with a drive through! Now that is convinience.
Crumm
Fordoholic
For all you Texans out there I thought I would post some Social Tips. Just trying to help out 
1. Never take a beer to an interview.
2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting them.
3. It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church.
4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it's time to change the sheets.
5. Even if you're certain that you're included in the will, it's rude to
drive a U-haul to the funeral..
Dining Out
1. When decanting the wine from the box, make sure you tilt the paper cup
and pour slowly so as not to 'bruise' the fruit of the wine.
2. If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your hands.
Entertaining in your home
1. A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a
taxidermist.
2. Do not allow the dog to eat at the table, no matter how good his manners
are.
Personal Hygiene
1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this job should be done in
private using one's own truck keys.
2 Even if you live alone, deodorant is not a waste of money.
3. Use of proper toiletries can only delay bathing for a few days.
4. Dirt and grease under the fingernails are a social no-no, as they tend
to distract from a woman's jewelry, and alter the taste of finger foods.
Dating (outside the family)
1. Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date.
2. Be assertive, Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go
out with you ever since I read that stuff on the bathroom walls two years
ago."
3. Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. Some will say
10:00 PM. Others might say "Monday," If the latter is the answer, it is the
man's responsibility to get her to school on time.
Theater Etiquette
1.. Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up immediately
after the movie has ended.
2. Refrain from talking to the characters on the screen. Tests have proven
that they can't hear you.
Weddings
1. Livestock, usually is a poor choice for a wedding gift.
2. Kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds might get you shot.
3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund
and a clean bowling shirt can create a tacky appearance.
4. Though uncomfortable, say 'yes' to socks and shoes for this special
occasion.
Driving Etiquette
1. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is loaded
and the deer is in sight.
2. When approaching a four way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires
does not always have the right of way.
3. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.
4. When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to
ask her to bring back beer too.
5. Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession
Only in Texas
1. Never take a beer to an interview.
2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting them.
3. It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church.
4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it's time to change the sheets.
5. Even if you're certain that you're included in the will, it's rude to
drive a U-haul to the funeral..
Dining Out
1. When decanting the wine from the box, make sure you tilt the paper cup
and pour slowly so as not to 'bruise' the fruit of the wine.
2. If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your hands.
Entertaining in your home
1. A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a
taxidermist.
2. Do not allow the dog to eat at the table, no matter how good his manners
are.
Personal Hygiene
1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this job should be done in
private using one's own truck keys.
2 Even if you live alone, deodorant is not a waste of money.
3. Use of proper toiletries can only delay bathing for a few days.
4. Dirt and grease under the fingernails are a social no-no, as they tend
to distract from a woman's jewelry, and alter the taste of finger foods.
Dating (outside the family)
1. Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date.
2. Be assertive, Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go
out with you ever since I read that stuff on the bathroom walls two years
ago."
3. Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. Some will say
10:00 PM. Others might say "Monday," If the latter is the answer, it is the
man's responsibility to get her to school on time.
Theater Etiquette
1.. Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up immediately
after the movie has ended.
2. Refrain from talking to the characters on the screen. Tests have proven
that they can't hear you.
Weddings
1. Livestock, usually is a poor choice for a wedding gift.
2. Kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds might get you shot.
3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund
and a clean bowling shirt can create a tacky appearance.
4. Though uncomfortable, say 'yes' to socks and shoes for this special
occasion.
Driving Etiquette
1. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is loaded
and the deer is in sight.
2. When approaching a four way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires
does not always have the right of way.
3. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.
4. When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to
ask her to bring back beer too.
5. Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession
Only in Texas
fgtex
Full Access Member
TX
Nowhere but Texas!
Man, I love this state! No wonder I can't leave.
fgtex
Nowhere but Texas!
Man, I love this state! No wonder I can't leave.
fgtex
94f450sd
certified nutjob
Crumm said:For all you Texans out there I thought I would post some Social Tips. Just trying to help out
1. Never take a beer to an interview.
2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting them.
3. It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church.
4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it's time to change the sheets.
5. Even if you're certain that you're included in the will, it's rude to
drive a U-haul to the funeral..
Dining Out
1. When decanting the wine from the box, make sure you tilt the paper cup
and pour slowly so as not to 'bruise' the fruit of the wine.
2. If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your hands.
Entertaining in your home
1. A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a
taxidermist.
2. Do not allow the dog to eat at the table, no matter how good his manners
are.
Personal Hygiene
1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this job should be done in
private using one's own truck keys.
2 Even if you live alone, deodorant is not a waste of money.
3. Use of proper toiletries can only delay bathing for a few days.
4. Dirt and grease under the fingernails are a social no-no, as they tend
to distract from a woman's jewelry, and alter the taste of finger foods.
Dating (outside the family)
1. Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date.
2. Be assertive, Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go
out with you ever since I read that stuff on the bathroom walls two years
ago."
3. Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. Some will say
10:00 PM. Others might say "Monday," If the latter is the answer, it is the
man's responsibility to get her to school on time.
Theater Etiquette
1.. Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up immediately
after the movie has ended.
2. Refrain from talking to the characters on the screen. Tests have proven
that they can't hear you.
Weddings
1. Livestock, usually is a poor choice for a wedding gift.
2. Kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds might get you shot.
3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund
and a clean bowling shirt can create a tacky appearance.
4. Though uncomfortable, say 'yes' to socks and shoes for this special
occasion.
Driving Etiquette
1. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is loaded
and the deer is in sight.
2. When approaching a four way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires
does not always have the right of way.
3. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.
4. When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to
ask her to bring back beer too.
5. Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession
Only in Texas
dude this isnt just for texas,this should also apply to upstate new york!!i went to upstate new york for my friends moms funeral last summer.while there we were out in my PSD burnin rubber before,during and after the funeral.his father was laughing and thought we were nuts but atleast we had him laughing and smiling
powerboatr
living well in Texas
Crumm,
that fits perfect with north bama, wher ei am stuck right now.
this very weekend we had Founders day for morgan city, population about 300 or so were told
both side of Highway 231were blocked for the half mile of flea market style yard sales and folks hooting and a hollering to waylon, willie and ray price songs, then as night came on sunday, all that was not sold was left out by the highway, with FREE signs .
it was a riot picked up a new gun rack for a quarter
that fits perfect with north bama, wher ei am stuck right now.
this very weekend we had Founders day for morgan city, population about 300 or so were told
both side of Highway 231were blocked for the half mile of flea market style yard sales and folks hooting and a hollering to waylon, willie and ray price songs, then as night came on sunday, all that was not sold was left out by the highway, with FREE signs .
it was a riot
picked up a new gun rack for a quarter 